Angry Birds

Angry Management

How old are you? Probably over 17 because you are reading WordPress rather than snap-chatting pictures of your junk.

Have you ever had Angry Birds installed on your phone? Most likely. I mean how else did you make your morning bombing raids of the super-bowl more interesting?

How many people are still interested in Angry Birds? Less than ever? Probably… it is a bit like left over cake: it looks inviting but you know you will hate yourself for indulging.

I’m not some wart infested mystic living in a tent this is just the way things are. The point being that Angry Birds has a wide audience even if it’s past its prime.

The Angry Birds movie should therefore cater to both a younger and an older audience, which admittedly it does, but at the detriment of the latter.

It’s become the most mind-numbingly generic and cliché aspect of modern animation – especially ones involving animals – is that there has to be a dance scene. Angry Birds takes this to the Nth degree by having flagrant disregard for where these scenes occur and why they occur.

Rovio Animation must have had a memo saying that dance scenes were what kids want from a film so they kicked together some garbage and threw it in the final film only because they had to – not because they wanted to.

There is an incredibly poor choice of songs that has been selected precisely because young people will recognise them. With their sparkly lights, colours and noises the only thing that would make this more appealing to those under 5 is if it came with jelly and ice-cream.

I realise this comes across as me sounding like a grumpy old man – to be fair; I fucking am – but these atrocious dance scenes stand out amongst the rest of the film because this adaptation of a phone game has otherwise been incredibly well realised as an animated movie.

The animation is actually better than it should be yet the most impressive part of it is how they have built well rounded characters from 2D weapons that happen to be in the shape of birds.

The film follows Red (Jason Sudeikis) who is the approximation of the original small red Angry Bird. He is “angry” at a society that is always naively happy and as a miserable old bastard I enjoyed sharing in his misanthropic frustration.

After being forced to go to anger management he meets two good friends who are also on the fringe of society. Chuck (Josh Gad) is our resident ADHD afflicted, most likely drug addicted, yellow bird whilst Bomb (Danny McBride) is our black bird with a tendency to explode when nervous or scared.

The only problem with the characters is that they only ever get angry in the closing section of the film. Even Red seems more cynical in his contempt for the world around him rather than angry.

It is genuinely surprising that Rovio Animation has made a film that makes sense of the game and even more surprising that most of the on-screen characters are likely to share traits with someone you know: proving that underneath the formulaic kiddy bullshit is a surprisingly deep film that was nearly catapulted to greatness.

The Good, The Bad and The Outcome:

+ Great animation
+ Innovative depiction of each bird
+ Good characterisation


– Terrible song choices
– Abysmal dance scenes
– They were never really angry

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