Sisters

Shitsters

Alright let’s face facts; when you see ‘top ten comedies of 2015’ including the likes of Spy, Mortdecai and even Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2 as the best of 2015 you know it’s been a terrible year for comedies.

Sisters adds to the stockpile of turds we’ve seen floating down the river humour this year by being somewhat comparable to Hot Pursuit.  Whilst this is undoubtedly a better movie than Hot Pursuit it’s not bad enough to make it ironically funny or memorable and yet it’s not funny enough to make you laugh out loud.

I’ve seen many reviews praising Sisters for being hilarious and perhaps I watched a different cut because (apart from one person in the cinema) there was only the odd murmur in my screening which was thankfully a whimsical chuckle and not the last gasps of someone bagging themselves to make the pain stop.

I should probably start off with a mention that the main characters; Maura Ellis (Amy Poehler) and Kate Ellis (Tina Fey), should probably be praised for being quite progressive. They swear, they drink, they smoke weed, they perv on men but they still like nails and make-up and dresses. In short the characters manage to dodge what could be a feminist/patriarchal minefield by being not fitting the stereotypical roles often portrayed in Hollywood for both male and female alike.

Unfortunately though; almost all the characters in sisters are fucking terrible and whilst Fay and Poehler seem like people who you could go to the pub with, they play the characters of terrible human beings. The whole film is based on the premise of these two ungracious ass hats crying about how unfair and unjust it is that their parents are selling a house they haven’t lived in for about 15 years. They both have such a spiteful dose of selfishness and disrespect for their parents from the outset of the film that I almost instantly wanted them to be thrown into the fires of Mount Doom.

I get it. I know they are meant to have some revelation and become better humans but seriously, fuck these shitty backstabbing humans because even at the end of the film they don’t seem to have changed it’s just a case of “Ooops we destroyed your house. sorry parents”.

We are also meant to believe that Kate is a wild child and Maura is straight-laced and decent but this is never fully realised. Maura is the main offender here. Her diaries talk about helping sight impaired people read instead of partying  yet she wholeheartedly goes along with inviting everyone to a no-holds barred party which includes buying enough booze to take down Oliver Reed and seeming all too happy to get tiny pinch of pure ‘blow-your-tits-off’ cocaine. How is that representing her as the reserved angel she’s meant to be?

Not content with having 2 obnoxious lead characters in waltzes Alex (Bobby Moynihan) who has to be one of the poorest character choices in comedy since Jar Jar Binks.

Alex is meant to be one of those guys who tries really hard to be funny without ever being funny. So let’s get this straight. The writers deliberately included someone who thinks he is funny but isn’t actually funny… in the hope that this will be funny. I guess praise should go to Bobby Moynihan’s performance here because he really does come across as a socially inept individual with the humour of a stick of celery. Well done. Nailed that character!

We then have Brinda (Maya Rudolph) who plays a stuck up bitch who could have been funny if she stayed miserable and hostile to the lead characters but she spends the whole time being a puppy who occidentally got locked out of the house. “Please let in?!”. 

It’s perhaps ironic then that the funniest character was Pazuzu (John Cena) the dealer because he says next to nothing. Instead he just stands there emotionless being about 2 feet taller and wider than everyone else. The contrast of this gargantuan stone cold drug peddler looking unimpressed with a room full of 40 something year old parents reclaiming their youth was not exactly side-splitting but he was, at least, amusing.

I guess the only part that came close to being hilarious in my eyes was the scene where a musical ballerina toy goes to the dark side by err…  being stuck somewhere it shouldn’t. A potential second scene is in a shop where the two leads show their ineptitude at trying on outfits (see picture above) but these moments are few and far between.

There have been plenty of other films that portray a party getting out of control and plenty that are more memorable than Sisters. Still, If you are wanting Christmas early then you can always go and consume this turkey!

Go See

  • Progressive female leads
  • Ballerina in the dark
  • John Cena

Avoid

  • Malicious lead characters and bad supporting characters
  • Bobby Moynihan
  • Void of hearty laughs

Overall

Stars_1_5

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